To Be or Not To Be

Running often provokes many struggles, both physical and mental. Most runners are plagued with an injury at some point in their careers; my first came in the form of hip pain last fall. Many of us struggle with finding time away from our families to work in our runs, and all the while wonder if we are being selfish (we are not). Some of us struggle with deciding if running is really worth the time and effort, or if we should just continue with our leisurely walks. My struggle this week involves racing - and I do use that term very loosely as I am by no means good enough to be competitive with anyone but myself.



I sometimes picture myself with an angel on one shoulder and a demon on the other. The demon, wearing his flip flops and holding a piece of chocolate cake in his hand, is shouting, "Just go home, watch America's Got Talent, and eat a package of Oreos! You are 43 - too old to pick up running. You couldn't even run as a child! " The angel, wearing her little white Asics and a sweatband, is saying, in her oh-so-gentle voice, "Keep on moving! You can do this! Just look how far you have come!" Fortunately, the angel usually wins that battle. This week the two are trying to sway my decision on an upcoming race. Our small community celebrates its birthday with a week-long festival, the Schweizer Fest. It is the time of year that friends and family return home, high school alumni host their reunions, and the annual road run is held. The road run consists of a 2-mile run and a 6-mile run, and last year boasted 500 runners. As a really new runner last year, I ran the 2-mile. Given the Southern Indiana heat and humidity, that was long enough! Since that time, I have planned to run the 6-mile this year. That race involves a steep mile-long incline at about mile 3.


I have been running that hill for over a year, and I have yet to feel that it is not difficult. I want to kiss the ground every time I reach the top. My running buddies and I have been running the course - in the evening - every week this summer in preparation for the race. In the evening...when I am wide awake, hydrated, well-fed, and ready to run. On the weekends, I run in the morning, which generally works well. Not so this summer. Even running early does not help my body adjust to the humidity. Back in the spring, I was able to run 10 miles; this summer, my furthest run has been 7 miles. This past weekend, I went out with a positive attitude ready to run at least 6 miles, but I had hoped to go further. I felt good, it was a pretty morning, and I had nothing on my agenda that would require me to hurry up and get home. I was so ready. Then I started to run, and it was hard. I ran slowly, and once I hit 3 miles, I had to walk. That little devil started in, "And you think you can run the 6-mile? Ha! You couldn't even run 6 on a flat course!" The angel was not around that morning. My guess is she slept in! I ran another mile, at a pace 2 minutes slower than usual - I was crawling. I was beginning to question my ability to run. What was happening? It was hot, but not really unbearable. Another walk break...another mile at tortoise pace...disappointment. During that run, I decided, with the help of the evil one, that I would not be signing up for the 6-mile race. I was not going to do it if I had to walk, and apparently that would be the case. I tried to analyze the reason behind my lack of energy: is it just more difficult to put the miles in in the morning because I am fresh out of bed, my muscles are not quite awake, I haven't eaten, and I haven't really drank anything? I have run in the mornings a lot over the past year, but this heat seems to make it much more difficult, if not impossible.


After I returned home from that dreadful outing, and told my husband of my decision. He didn't see my logic. He thinks that I should just get out there and run it; if I have to walk or run at a slower pace, who cares? Jackie, one of my running buddies who has trained for this race with me, had the same sentiment. 'Why can't we just run it for fun and fitness?" she said. That evening, Jackie was going to be running. I rarely run twice in one day, but I had to prove to myself that I could do it. So I went out and ran 4 miles with her, and we ran it at a good pace. I felt great - totally different from just 12 hours earlier. Last night a group of us went out to run the 6-mile course. I ran it, and I ran it well. Our goal is to run it in under an hour. I ran it in 56:39. I want to run that race. I want to run it well. I just know that if I have to walk, knowing that I should be able to run the whole course, I will be angry. When people say to just run it for fun, I am thinking what fun is it to run a horrible race? What fun is it to run slower than I am capable of IN A RACE???


Jackie and I are going to run the course again Saturday at 8:00 am. That is exactly 2 weeks before the actual race. That run will likely determine if I sign up. Which one will win: the little devil or my encouraging little angel? Then I have yet another decision to make: to run a half marathon or not. It is on my bucket list, and there is one in October that is just an hour away. My friend, Jennifer, is running it, so I would have someone to train with. I was really going back and forth on this, and then my husband, yes, the one with the artificial knee, comes home with a half marathon training plan that HE plans to do! If he plans to run it, what excuse could I possibly come up with to not run it?! As if that isn't enough, Traxee has issued a challenge for us women to set a fall goal, and to support one another in meeting those goals. I think my little angel has been busy aligning the stars.


As of this moment, no official decisions have been made. My little angel is working hard by putting the right people in front of me. I do know that I make most important decisions by asking myself what I would be most likely to regret. Would I regret not running the 6-mile race? (yeh, I know the answer). Would I regret not attempting to run a half marathon with my husband? (I know that answer, too).


Note: I added this picture from a New Year's Day run to remind everyone that someday this sickening heat will end!

My First 10k

While sitting through the awards ceremony for a 5k and 10k race in Owensboro last summer, I made the decision that this year I would run the 10k.  After running the 5k last year (my second 5k), I felt that I was making necessary improvements, and that just maybe I could run 6.2 miles at some point in time.  It didn't hurt that in my age group (40-44) in the 10k, there were only 2 runners, so even if I had crawled across the finish line, I would have placed! 

I now run 6+ miles at least once a week, so as July approached I felt ready to take on this challenge.  I attempted to get some friends to sign up for the 10k; they also run at least 6 miles once a week, so I knew that it wasn't a matter of whether or not they could complete the mileage.  Jennifer said that she just didn't like that distance.  I must admit, this scared me because Jennifer runs half marathons, and if she didn't feel comfortable running a 10k, what made me think I could do it?  My other running buddy, Jackie, just isn't really interested in racing.  So, Gary and I were on our own.  My goal was to finish in under an hour, and secretly, I really wanted to place.

I didn't get nervous...until the 45 minute drive to Owensboro.  Then my stomach started to question my sanity.  In its rumblings I heard what the hell were you thinking?  It was hot outside, there were going to be fast runners, and I am no expert at running!  My husband never gets nervous about a race.  He just goes out, does the best he can, and is satisfied with completing the run.  Hmm...

As we lined up for the race donning our numbers and our timing chips, I attempted positive self-talk:  I always run 6 miles - this is no different.  Just get out there and run.  It doesn't matter what your time is; not many people can run 6 miles.  Your stomach feels great.  You get the point.  The gun went off, and I took off.  Gary and I don't start together, we just give each other a good-luck kiss and run our own races.  I knew no one else, so I was on my own for those 6.2 miles.  As usual in a race, I stayed up with the pack for the first half mile.  I kept looking at my Garmin thinking you don't run this fast - you can't run this fast - you will be done by mile 2!  I slowed down to a steady pace and tried to take in my surroundings.  The race was flat (thank you, God!), and through a residential neighborhood.  As I admired the huge old homes, my mind began to relax.  I was running at about a 9 minute pace, but I didn't think I could keep it up the whole way.  I just decided that I would keep that pace as long as possible, and that I was going to really push myself.  Who cared if I vomited at the finish line or my muscles retaliated for the next several days?  I wanted to see what my 43-year-old body could do.

Hydrate...we all know how important that is in the summer heat, but I still don't like grabbing water in a race.  Until this race, I only had once, in my very first race, and that was more trouble than it was worth.  So, in my crazy race thinking, as we passed by the water stations, my thoughts were here is my chance to pass some people!  I know - it's stupid!  I passed up water and was happy when others stopped to hydrate so that I could pass them!  Nevermind that I might be passed out up the road a bit, and they could then trample my mean dehydrated butt!  And for the record, I did take a sip at the last station (there was no one around who could pass me at that time!).

I did manage to pass a few runners throughout the race.  In the last mile, I passed a lady, who I thought could be in my age group, and then she passed me!  Ooohh...the race was really on!  The finish line was on the track of a college football field, and once we hit that track I used that final burst of energy to pass her - again!  At last, the finish line.  I had done it!  My time:  56:39!  My pace:  9:09!  I had never run that fast for that long.  I was thrilled.  I know that to those of you who are really runners, that speed is by no means competitive, but for me, it was flying!

Gary, as most of you know, has an artificial knee, and most orthopedics would say he shouldn't be running.  He gets out there, though, and he works so hard.  He was determined to run this race, and his goal was to run it in under 1:30:00.  He ran it in 1:24:00!  He said that he had such a great feeling of accomplishment when crossing that finish line, and that where he placed didn't matter in the least.  He had met his goal!

For our area, Owensboro has some really great runners.  Because there were cash prizes for this race, they were all there!  As I wrote earlier, last year there were only 2 runners in my division; this year there were 7 (just as my luck would have it!).  When I went to look at the results, my feeling of elation was quickly deflated.  I was 5th out of 7!  The overall female winner was from my age group and her time was 39:31!  She ran at a 6:23 pace, which in my wildest competitive dreams, I could never do.  That's about my sprint pace at the track, and I can only do that for about 100 meters!  The runner who placed 3rd in my division ran it in 45:36, so I was 11 minutes from even placing!  Eleven minutes!  After my initial disappointment and whining, I was still proud of my time and effort.  In the female category, I was 26/41, so I did beat some runners.  And really, aren't we all winners just for getting out there in front of everyone and running 6.2 miles?  How many people do you know who can do that?  I know a few, but when we consider percentages of the overall population, we rock!  I will go back next year, but with much different expectations. 

Will I do a 10k again?  Probably.  It did take all week to recover, which surprised me.  After a 5k I can just jump back into my normal running routine, but I didn't run well last week at all.  My legs were just tired and didn't want to cooperate with my brain!  My stomach was not quite right for a few days.  It started hurting immediately after the race and hurt on and off all night.

Our next race is the Schweizer Fest 6 mile (the 2 mile has been sounding rather appealing in this heat!).  It is a hometown race that drew over 500 runners last year.  I really prefer to run out of town where no one knows me, but we have been training for this race all summer.  I just have to figure out how to train my stomach to stay under control when I get nervous!

On a side note...I am really thrilled that I received the following email last night:

HI Joyce!




Just wanted to let you know that we’ll be announcing your blog name on our Traxee sites this week as a winner of the Traxee “Best Blogs By Women Runners” poll.

Thanks so much to Traxee.com and expecially to Beth Moore, who has been inspiring female runners everywhere!


Keep on Running, Friends!  It does a body good!  Thanks for reading!

Vacation Running

Heading off for a summer vacation? Don't let that stop you from exercising or running! I have heard people say that they are going out of town and won't be able to run for a few days or a week. Why not? I have only been running for about a year and a half, but have had the opportunity to run in some great places - which has made my trips even more memorable!
Last summer my husband and I took our daughter and granddaughter for a weekend at a bed and breakfast and to visit some caves. Although it was a short trip, I managed to work in a much-needed run. I got up early on Sunday morning and ran before the girls even thought about crawling out of bed. Not only did it give me some time to myself, it also gave me a different view of the countryside where the B&B is located. I prefer to do out-and-back runs in unfamiliar territory; I would hate to get lost out there!
Over Labor Day weekend, my husband and I, along with my sister and her husband, met our cousins in Las Vegas for some family time (okay, and a little fun too!). I was running six days a week at that time, and didn't want to miss fours days. I was a bit leary of running in Vegas by myself, so I got online and looked for a race to run. As luck would have it (appropriate for Vegas), there was a 5k that Saturday about 15 minutes outside of the city. I signed us up! You should have seen the look on my husband's face when I told him I had found a race to run - not a look of appreciation, but rather one of I can't believe you are looking for races when we are going to Vegas for the first time! We did run the race, and it was incredible! I can still picture running along with the mountains ahead of me~breathtaking. I couldn't tell you my time in that race; that wasn't the purpose. I can tell you that it is one of my fondest memories from that trip.
I love Chicago! I spent my first eleven years about a half an hour outside of the Windy City, and I still enjoy going back for a visit. My good running friend, Kim, and I had the awesome opportunity to attend the International Reading Conference in Chicago in April. I was excited about the conference, but I was really excited about the possibility of running along Lake Michigan! That's exactly what we did our first day in the city. Our hotel was a straight shot from Navy Pier, so we ran there together, and then, since Kim is much faster than I, we separated and ran on our own. It was incredible! As I ran along, to my left was the lake, to the right was the gorgeous Chicago skyline, and straight ahead was the Field Museum of History. I was in awe. Even the brisk wind off of the lake didn't deter me from enjoying every step of my run. We were able to run twice while in Chicago (and once on the hotel treadmill, but that doesn't count!). My husband was concerned about our safety when we were out running (okay, he was concerned the whole trip), but I felt completely safe the entire time. I wouldn't go out after dark and run alone, but there were a lot of runners along the lake, and I never felt uncomfortable. One just has to be smart!
This summer my husband, daughter, and I went to Virginia Beach to visit my step-daughter and her family. The trip came up at the last minute, so our budget was tight. We stayed with our family rather than paying $200/night for an Oceanfront room on the Boardwalk, but one of my goals was to run the Boardwalk. Our first morning there we ran in our daughter's neighborhood, which was a great way to see the homes and to learn how to get around. There were runners and bikers everywhere! It was very motivating to see so many people out exercising. On Saturday morning my husband and I drove to the Boardwalk area for our run. Wow! Was it ever worth the $15 we paid just to park! There were runners everywhere. It wasn't long ago that I would have just walked along in envy as I watched the runners pass me by; now I am one of them! The ocean waves were crashing in, children were playing in the sand (or whining to their parents), a couple was getting ready to get married, another older couple was walking along with a huge parrot (that kind of freaked me out when I ran by them - couldn't you just see the headline: FEMALE RUNNER ATTACKED BY PARROT ON BOARDWALK!), and I was absorbing it all. There was so much to see that the run was almost secondary.
From now on I will make running part of my vacation experience. If that means waking before everyone else, I know that it will be worth it. I can see so much more when I run rather than just driving by in the car. I can experience the sights, sounds, and smells, greet the other runners, and get to know my surroundings. I know that being somewhere unfamiliar means that I also have to be more cognizant of my safety. I live in a small town, so when I run I don't take my phone. If something happened, someone would know who I am and whom to contact. I take my phone when I run out of town, run in busy areas and when it is light, and pay attention to who is around me. I also try to look confident and in control. Looking like a potential victim could easily make me one. I am only 5 feet tall, so I definitely don't look very intimidating!
So next time you are going out of town, whether it be for business or pleasure, try to plan some time to run. You might just be surprised at what you see and what you learn!