Running Friends

As women, we rely upon our friends for support, encouragement, a listening ear, and laughter. My husband also provides these, but the relationships we have with other women are just different - and necessary! Although my husband will listen to my complaints about PMS, he can't truly empathize. Can a man truly understand why gaining 3 pounds of water is so devastating, or how our hormones can suddenly cause us to want to rip off the head of someone who unintentionally angers us? We are emotional, and sometimes it's just calming to spend time with someone who has felt the same way.

When I am thinking about the many ways that running has been beneficial in my life, I often think about the friends and fellow runners I have been in contact with. Running seems to help create a special bond among people. We all understand how difficult running can be, particularly when one is just beginning. We remember (or still endure) the stiff legs, the pain felt when ascending a flight of stairs, and the feeling of accomplishment when we finally ran that first mile! The first time that I experienced the full impact of the camaradarie of running was at a race in Owensboro, Kentucky. My husband and I had run the 5k, and were watching the finish of the 10k (after having gone to Cold Stone Creamery for our post-race indulgence). We were impressed by the fast finishers, but what most impressed me was when the final runner was coming toward the finish, and the crowd all started clapping and cheering for her. There was more cheering for her than for the young man who had won. She had finished, and we all knew what an accomplishment that was. I was hooked.

Shortly after I began running last year, my childhood friend Jackie started to run. We grew up on the same block, and I spent a lot of time with her family. Her sister is my age and has been one of my best friends for years. Last year, I met goals earlier than Jackie simply because I had begun a couple months before her. It was helpful because when I knew that I could run 2 miles, I pushed her to meet that mark. We ran together about 3 times a week, and I ran on my own a couple of days. Together we complained about our achy legs and feet, the heat, the absurdity of running, and anything else we could come up with. But we kept running. We still run several times a week together. I love that time with my friend; we talk about everything as we run the streets of our small town. What great therapy! Back when I started running I would see runners talking as they ran along, and I wondered how they could possibly talk when I could hardly breathe! Now people ask us the same question. This summer another friend, Jennifer, has started running with us. She is younger than the two of us, and much more athletic, but it has been great to get to know her better.

Running has strengthened my relationship with my niece Erin. She is getting ready to head off to grad school in August, but over the past year we have spent many hours together running. We have run some races together, which is something I will always cherish. Erin has such a positive attitude, and being 20 years my junior, she also has more energy! Many times she runs just a few feet in front of us, but that seems to pull us along and motivate us to run a little faster. Erin's mother - my older sister - has begun to run too. She has been walking (extremely fast) for a few years, so the transition to running is going well for her. She has had some other commitments this summer, but I hope that she gets back into running this fall.

If you haven't noticed, runners like to talk about running! Don't ask me for advice on how to get started or why I run unless you have plenty of time for my answer! There is so much to say about running. I think that most of us feel so blessed to be running that we want to share the joy with anyone who will listen. I want my friends to reap the benefits. I believe that in this sport we should pay it forward. My principal (Laura) and my good friend from school (Kim) have helped me and encouraged me for the past year. I really owe the fact that I can call myself a runner to them. They always made me feel like I could do it, and when I would get discouraged, they were right there pushing. I will always be grateful to them, and I want to do my part to do the same for others.

My husband, who is my best friend, also runs. I find this incredibly impressive because not only is he 16 years older than I, but the man also has an artificial knee! He actually started running before I did, which made it a little difficult to find a valid excuse not to run. He is not fast; he jokes about getting passed by walkers in races. He is out there - and I am very proud. We don't run together because our paces are different, but we do go to races together, and we drive to town together for our runs. We each take off on our own and meet up later. I am glad that this is something we can enjoy and work on together. Fortunately, our youngest child is 13, so if we want to go for a run, we can just go.

About running with friends...the fact is, we all have bad days. Your bad days won't likely fall on the same days as your friend's bad days. Talk ahead of time about how you want to handle that. When I have bad days where I feel like my legs are stuck in quick sand, I don't want to ruin Jackie's or Jennifer's workout - they might just feel awesome that day. Likewise, if I am having a great day, I want to push to see how far or how fast I can go. Having an understanding that it is okay to run ahead is necessary. There will be days when you both might not feel so great; then you can stop and walk together. This past Sunday was a scorcher in our area. We ran at 8:00 a.m., but it was already miserable and humid. Jackie and I took off with the intention of running at least 6 miles, but the hope of going further. By the time we had run 4 miles, I was done. I told Jackie that I was going to walk, but that she should go on. She didn't feel great either, so she also walked. We ended up walking 4 miles, and it was actually enjoyable to just walk and chat, knowing that although we weren't burning as many calories, we were still exercising. Last night Jackie, Jennifer, and I ran a 6-mile course that we will be running in a race in August. It is a tough course with a mile incline in the middle (I complain every single time I run it). We ran together until we got to the killer hill, then we each ran our own pace. We also ran our own pace for the last mile and a half. I like to try to speed up at that point, and I wanted to break an hour. We each finished at a different time, but we met at the finish line.

I have many friends who are now attempting to get started running (esp. Kelli, Annette, Lori, Kassi, and Emily), and I am so happy for them. The benefits are endless. I am in the best shape of my life, I have great new and old friends, I have more confidence, and I can call myself a runner. Share the joy with a friend!